Cultivate Presence: How To Practice Being Present In Your Life

Presence 1

Presence can be defined as the power to be more attuned with oneself and be able to express yourself more freely. Itโ€™s the magic of presence that helps you connect with your authentic self. Mastering the art of being present takes practice, but itโ€™s an essential key to unlocking the real potential of yourself and being more confident.

When you cultivate being present, people notice and pay attention. You nonverbally communicate your self-worth, that you matter, and expect to be respected. You gain a presence that conveys self-acceptance. It enables you to be open and confident.

Openness requires self-esteem that providesย courageย and allows you to be authentic and take risks. Youโ€™re not interested in hiding who you are or worried about making mistakes andย rejectionย as you would if youโ€™ve suffered from shame and accompanyingย anxietyย and self-doubt.

You wonโ€™t bother to convince people or make someone like you. Instead, you listen to othersโ€™ opinions, although you may disagree, and associate with friends who do.

Being Present and Cultivate Your Presence

Signs of Presence

When youโ€™re present, people can tell and are drawn to you. Yourย soulย shines through. Presence reflects integrity andย mindfulness. What are the signs?

  1. You make eye contact.
  2. Youโ€™re not self-conscious but are fully focused in the present.
  3. Yet, youโ€™re connected to and aware of your feelings and bodily sensations.
  4. With another person, youโ€™re able to fully listen without an agenda.
  5. You accept yourself and are not controlled by fear, shame, or your past.
  6. You donโ€™t try to fill silences, impress anyone, or seek their approval.
  7. Youโ€™reย authenticย and donโ€™t hide who you are or your thoughts and feelings.
  8. You feel equal and connected to others.
  9. You know who you are and your needs, thoughts, and feelings are separate.
  10. You donโ€™t react to or defend yourself from othersโ€™ opinions.
  11. You take responsibility for your feelings, words, actions, andย triggersย with โ€œIโ€ statements.
  12. You expect to be treated with respect.
  13. You protect yourself courteously when you feel your boundaries are crossed.
  14. Your communication is honest, direct, andย assertive.

Read: 27 Lessons I Learned In 27 Years To Staying In The Present Moment

How To Be More Present

You can practice presence throughout your day:

  1. Accept your thoughts, sensations, and feelings without judgment.
  2. Be mindful throughout the day to replace negative with positive thoughts.
  3. Notice whether your thoughts and feelings are related to the present.
  4. Ask yourself, โ€œWhere is my breath?โ€ Is it in your chest, throat, belly? Bring it into your belly.
  5. When you feel pain in the present, donโ€™t reject it. Accept it, and let it pass through you.
  6. Connect to your senses. Listen to and honor bodily needs and impulses.
  7. Accept that unpleasant events are learning opportunities to grow.
  8. Practice gratitude.
  9. Speak to yourself kindly with encouragement and gentleness as you would a young child.
  10. Practiceย mindful meditation.

Developing Self-Acceptance

Self-Acceptance is a deeper level of self-esteem. Meditation andย self-loveย help us practice presence and self-acceptance. There isย evidenceย that high levels of mindfulness correlate with higher levels of self-esteem and more secure self-worth. In a meditative state, we can notice and disregard ourย self-judgmentsย and anxieties.

Read: How Self Love Is The Key To Codependency Recovery

We can practice presence in that timeless state and learn that moment-to-moment we can accept everything just as it is, including ourselves. This is liberating to us and anyone we encounter.

However, itโ€™s not easy to always function at that level. Without years of practice and healing our past, we soon return to our habitual ways of being. We react and have expectations, frustrations, disappointments, fears, and anxieties.

Being authentic requires that weโ€™re vulnerable. There are many uncomfortable feelings, needs, and states that are part of the human condition. It can be a challenge to be open and accept them all, especially if we haveย internalized shame.ย 

Practicing a loving presence with ourselves enables us to accept and allow whatever weโ€™re feeling to flow through usย without attachment.ย Doing so can heal us, as our habits and past conditioning wash away. Practicing self-acceptance also helps us to accept and not react to others.

We have opportunities throughout each day to accept, allow, andย affirmย ourย real selves.ย That also means we may express ourselves, make requests, andย set boundaries.ย Weโ€™re neither hiding nor emotionally reacting.

Get theย Self-Love Meditation.

ยฉ 2021 Darlene Lancer

Written By: Darlene Lancer
Originally Appeared On: What Is Codependency
Presence Pin

— Share —

Published On:

Last updated on:

,

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

How Delusional Confidence Can Help You Succeed (Even If You Doubt Yourself)

5 Reasons Why You Should Practice Delusional Confidence

Society tells us to be humble, to wait our turn, to only claim what we can prove. But what if the secret to success isnโ€™t waiting for proofโ€”itโ€™s acting like you already have it?

Some of the most successful people in history werenโ€™t necessarily the smartest, the most talented, or the best prepared. They were the ones who refused to entertain doubt. They acted as if their success was inevitableโ€”until it was.

Delusional confidence is not about arrogance or ignorance; itโ€™s about choosing belief over fear, faith over hesitation. Itโ€™s about backing yourself so hard that the universe has no choice but to meet you halfway.

Up Next

A Gentle Guide To Spring Cleaning Every Part Of Your Life

Spring Clean Your Life in 8 Simple Steps!

If youโ€™ve been feeling stuck, unmotivated, or just a little off, youโ€™re not alone. The start of the year can be tough, and sometimes, it feels like weโ€™re just going through the motions. But with spring finally here, itโ€™s the perfect opportunity to reset, refresh, and spring clean your lifeโ€”not just your home, but your mind, habits, and daily routine.

Think of it as a fresh start, a chance to let go of whatโ€™s been weighing you down and make space for new energy and motivation. Whether itโ€™s decluttering your space, breaking free from negative habits, or simply creating more time for yourself, a little spring cleaning can go a long way.

Here are some things you can do over the next few weeks to glow up and snap out of the funk.

Up Next

The โ€˜Grass Is Greenerโ€™ Syndrome: Why You Always Want More (But Never Feel Satisfied)

5 Toxic Signs Of Grass Is Greener Syndrome: Do You Relate?

Do you ever feel like no matter what you have, something better is always out there? That nagging feeling that your relationship, job, or life in general could be more exciting, or just… better? If so, you might be dealing with the Grass is Greener Syndrome.

Itโ€™s that restless voice in your head that constantly wonders if you made the wrong choice. You scroll through social media and see people seemingly living their best lives, traveling to exotic destinations, landing dream jobs, or being in picture-perfect relationships. 

And suddenly, what you have feels dull in comparison. This constant chase for something โ€œbetterโ€ can be exhausting and, more importantly, prevent you from appreciating the present moment.

Letโ€™s learn more about it if you find yourself getting stuck in the โ€˜Grass is Gr

Up Next

5 Key Mindset Shifts To Make Your Dreams Come True

5 Powerful Mindset Shifts That Will Make Your Dream Life a Reality

Mindset shifts are the key to manifesting your dream life.

Every year, I set goals and made vision boards, convinced that this time, things would change. But by the end of the year, nothing had moved. It felt like I was stuck in the same place, no matter how hard I tried.

Eventually, I realized the problem wasnโ€™t my goalsโ€”it was my mindset. I had limiting beliefs running the show, quietly holding me back from everything I wanted. My thoughts were filled with self-doubt, and deep down, I didnโ€™t truly believe I could have the life I was dreaming of.

So, I made a change. I started paying attention to my thoughts and replacing negative ones with self-affirming beliefs. I stopped questioning if I was “good enough” or if my dreams were “too big.” Instead, I started acting as if

Up Next

15 Profound Universal Truths To Understand The Human Condition

15 Profound Universal Truths to Understand the Human Condition

Have you ever noticed how some truths about life just hit different? These universal truths about the human condition are the kind that stick with you long after youโ€™ve heard them.

KEY POINTS

Well-written memoirs often share universal truths that connect with readers on a deeper level.

Universal truths are many, and each of us can have our own unique set.

Learning about others’ universal truths can help you find our own way.

In my memoir writing workshops, I always emphasize the importance of each story having a universal truth. While many are w

Up Next

Are You Too Non Confrontational? Hereโ€™s How Itโ€™s Sabotaging Your Life

Is Being Non Confrontational A Bad Thing? 5 Clear Reasons

Are you the type of person who stays silent even when something bothers you, just to keep the peace? If so, you might consider yourself as a non confrontational personality. But what if I told you that this trait might be doing you harm, more than helping you?

While avoiding confrontation might seem like the best way to maintain peace in relationships and workplaces, it often comes at a high cost. Letโ€™s dive into why being non confrontational is affecting you and how you can strike a balance between peacekeeping and standing up for yourself.

Up Next

7 Surprising Benefits Of Touching Grass (Youโ€™ll Want To Do It Daily!)

7 Cool Benefits Of Touching Grass: (You Should Try It!)

Ever heard someone say, โ€œGo touch some grassโ€? Itโ€™s an internet slang often thrown around as an insult, telling people to log off and reconnect with reality. But behind the sarcasm, thereโ€™s actual wisdom in those words. So, let us explore the real benefits of touching grass.

We spend hours glued to screens, scrolling or doom scrolling through social media, binge-watching shows, or getting lost in heated online debates. Spending too much time online can leave you feeling disconnected, drained, and overwhelmed.

The constant floo