This Is Why You Should Never Chase A Man

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This Is Why You Should Never Chase A Man 1

Even if you are attracted to him still you should never chase a man. Hereโ€™s why.

Youโ€™re attracted to a new guy and he seems like he is interested inย you, too. But when he doesnโ€™t call or text you (like he said he would) you convince yourself heโ€™s shy and insecure and heโ€™s afraid to call you and ask you out.

You call himย to โ€œhelp him outโ€ but heโ€™s sounds unenthusiastic and uncommunicative and he coolly declines your invitation to meet forย coffee or a cocktail.

Read 9 Reasons Why You Should Never Chase A Guy

Your heart sinks because you know you made an irreversible mistake in calling him.ย ย 

Or maybe you were nervous on your first date and youโ€™re afraid you blotched with him. You worry that you didnโ€™t show enough interest in him, or that you talked too much or you drank too much.

You agonize,ย should you call him to reinforce your interest in himโ€”or should you wait for him to call you?

You succumb to your anxiety andย self-doubt and you call him. You invite him over for dinner or to the moviesย and he blows you off.

Or you haunt his favorite hangout hoping to run into him; you think if he sees you it will rekindle his interest in you, but instead you are chagrined by his aloofย reception.

If you have to guess whether or not to call him โ€ฆ the answer is, โ€œDONโ€™T CALL!โ€

Letโ€™s say you do get a second and even a third date with a guy. You want him to know you like him and so you do things like:

  • Facebook him and make comments on his activities.
  • Offerย to cook dinner for him after a first date.
  • Textย him to stay in contact or invite him to meet for a drink.
  • Callย him because you heard or read something interesting or to invite him to an event.
  • Keepย his favorite beer or liquor on hand.
  • Offerย to sew a missing button on his shirt.
  • Offerย to pick up his mail when he goes out of town or pick him up from the airport.
  • Cancelย your plans with your girlfriend to go out with him.
  • Giveย him gifts, mailย him cuteย cards or sendย flowers to his home or work (yes, women do this!).
  • Dropย by his work or house unexpectedly to say โ€œhello.โ€

Please tell me youโ€™re not secretly driving by his work or home to keep tabs on him!

Girl, get a grip on your insecurities andย STOPย selling yourself short!ย Pining for a man who doesnโ€™t feel the same way about you sets you up forย seriousย rejection and disappointmentย that rips gaping holes in your self-esteem.

If you donโ€™t think you worth his pursuitโ€”neither will he!

Think about it: if a new guy foams at the mouth to get a date with you by flooding you with texts, phone calls and emails, he shows up at your house unannounced, he constantly does nice things for you and he tells you he wants to take you away for weekendโ€”thereโ€™s NO mystery. Thereโ€™s NO tension. Thereโ€™s NO reason to be excited about him.

Read Men Donโ€™t Like To Chase Too Much

If heโ€™s not pursuing youโ€”it means heโ€™s not into you!

Give a guy credit. Men know they must pursue a woman if they want to win her love, affection and commitment. Men love a challenge and they love a bit of a โ€œchaseโ€ (that intoxicating time BEFORE sexual involvement with his woman of interest).

The chase is when a man subconsciously forms his initial emotional attachment for you. But if you chase himย (or youโ€™re too nice, tooย accommodating, too availableย or you have sex with him too soon), you take over his role as the suitor and he will lose his interest in you and hisย motivation for the chase.

Sister, itโ€™s time to reprogram your dating computer.ย You ARE the SELECTOR.ย He IS the PURSUER.

His job is to court you,ย woo you, impress you and convince YOU that he is the absolute best man for you.

Your job is to be charming, receptive and appreciative of his gentlemanly efforts, while you are deciding if HE is worthy of your attention, love and commitment.

If youย believe youย AREย the prize, he will sense your confidence and self-worth and he will work double-time to win your favor.

But donโ€™t play coy or hard-to-get because heโ€™ll think youโ€™re a snob or that youโ€™re not interested in him and he will drift away.


Written Byย Nancy Nichols
Originally Appeared On knowitallnancy.com
Printed with Permission

This Is Why You Should Never Chase A Man

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